Posts Tagged ‘relationship books’

Maybe She Was Really Looking For A Guy With Confidence

July 10th, 2009 by guest-author | No Comments | Filed in Get Ex Girlfriend Back

If you happen to be like most men who want to get their ex girlfriend back, perhaps the biggest problem you are dealing with right now is how to overcome the pain and the humiliation of the breakup, especially if she dumped you. It may very well be that at least a part of the reason she decided to call it quits was that you lack sufficient self confidence, which women believe to be essential in their guy. Whether or not you were strong before the break up, presently you probably feel that you are at your lowest point. Because of this, it can be very tempting to want to wear your heart on your sleeve, by which I mean that you are inclined to let her see how badly you are feeling right now. But this is undoubtedly the worst thing you could do, and it will not increase you chances of winning your ex girlfriend back. In fact, if you do this it will likely make it near impossible to get her back.

I detail strategies for getting back with your ex girlfriend in more detail on my Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back page, which you might want to read now.

So why exactly is it that low self confidence in a guy is such a turn off to women? The fact is, low confidence in the opposite sex, be it a man or a woman, is just emotionally draining for their partner. Most people have a hard enough time dealing with whatever other problems the world has to throw at them. They get beat up and are constantly bombarded by people who go out of their way to make them feel that they aren’t good enough for one thing or the other, or that they don’t have enough in their lives.

It could be that your ex girlfriend is simply flat sick of having to deal with the stress and strains of normal, everyday life. The last thing she needs is to have to prop you up when she is really looking for your strength and support. In other words, if you exhibit any signs of depression, or you are just in the habit of appearing to be down most of the time, well those symptoms are contagious. What she really needs is someone who is going to make her feel great about not just herself, but life in general. So if you want to win her back you should be capable of making her feel good.

If she sees you moping around she will not want to spend any time with you. Period. In fact, you will only be reminding her about why the two of you broke up to begin with. So do not kid yourself that offering her a mopey face is going to buy you any sympathy points. This can only come off as a desperate ploy that is almost certain to result in failure. She will simply see you will as a burden and you will destroy any chance you had of getting her back.

Remember, what she wants is the same thing that you need from a partner – someone who wants help the other person deal with the challenges of each new day, someone who will be strong for them, and who makes them strong, helping to shoulder the weight of life’s problems. What your ex girlfriend wants is a guy that she can conquer the world with. She needs to see that you are capable of offering that to her. If she can see these qualities in you then she is much more likely to view you as the guy that she needs to have in her life. So, try to live your life confidently, and even if you fail to win back your ex girlfriend you will at least end up being much happier with your life.

Regardless of the outcome, it might be time to check out one of the better men’s dating books that I have reviewed on my site. For example, if you want to find out how women really think, so that you do not get yourself into the same problem as you are in now, check out the review on my Fireworks With Females review page.

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If You Want Her Back, Sorry Is As Sorry Does

July 5th, 2009 by guest-author | No Comments | Filed in Get Ex Girlfriend Back

So there you are – you realize that you have completely botched it with your woman and now it is going to be on you to figure out how to win her back. The good news is that you do not need to be a genius to figure out what the first step needs to be. The simplest, and most logical, step is just to say that you are sorry. As it was your fault, just face the music and confess to it. You are the one that messed up the relationship, so it is going to be up to you to make sure you correct the situation. She has no reason to do the hard work here, so the sooner you accept that fact, the more likely it is that you will be able to win her back. If you are not used to apologizing, and saying that you are sincerely sorry for your misbehavior then this brief article should point you in the right direction as I suggest to you how to get back with your girlfriend.

I detail methods for getting back with your ex girfriend in more detail on my Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back page, which you might want to read now.

The first step in this process of how to get back with your girlfriend is to say you are sorry. Now, it is very important that when you say you are sorry that you show some real remorse, because then you can ask for her forgiveness, and tell her that it will not happen again. Only if she believes that you truly wish to make it up to her, will she allow you to demonstrate this to her. Otherwise, if she cottons on to the idea that you really begrudge your apology to her, then you will not get far with this. If you plan to fake your sincerity with her, you might as well not bother picking up that phone, or showing up at her door.

Let me emphasize that for you again, because it is important. You must show her that you really feel bad about what she went through. You have to show some remorse. This is not the time to exercise your tough guy demeanor. This does not mean that you have to show watery eyes or anything that is going to have you feeling truly uncomfortable. This is not what she wants to see from you anyway. Just lower your eyes when you tell her that you are sorry. This way you will seem to be too ashamed to meet her eyes. Do not try to look cute. This kind of behavior is not congruent with the aim of appearing genuinely sorry.

The second part of learning how to get back with your girl involves understanding how to ask her for forgiveness. You must be sincere, or at the very least you need to try hard to seem that way. If you truly want to get back together with your girlfriend you must acknowledge the fact that she is expecting you to be nothing less than sincere with her. If you cannot be sincere you will need to be a really good actor, and that in itself may just be harder to pull off than simply accepting that you ought to be sincere with her.

Let her see that you are not going to ever do whatever it was that put you in the doghouse with her to begin with. This will probably be a hard thing for you to do because, let’s face it, we males find it hard to accept the possibility that we might be anything less than perfect. Most men discover that it is hard for them to tell someone that they will not screw up again. But this is exactly what you need to do. Nor can you simply say to her, “I’ll try”. You have to commit to not repeating the mode of behavior that got you into the trouble that you find yourself in right now. You are bound to make mistakes again – you just have to keep from repeating that particular mistake, otherwise she is going to feel that you have been wasting her time, and you will not be given that third chance to get back with your girlfriend.

When you tell her how sorry you are you will likely have to sell it with the promise of a nice treat. Perhaps a fancy meal somewhere. Or buy her a nice gift. You cannot buy her love back, but you can buy a little of her time to try winning it back, and if you have done everything else correctly this should be like placing a nice little bow on top of your apology. Go all out with this. It might be obvious to her what you are attempting to do, but it may well be worth it as she sees just what you are willing to put yourself through to gain her love again. The more it appears as though you are really trying to get back together with her, and that you are sincerely sorry for what you have done, the greater your chances of successfully benefitting from these lessons on how to get back with your girlfriend.

Once you get back with her you may want to consider reading one of the better men’s books on dating, like the one discussed on my The Art Of Approaching page. This way you will learn more about what it is that a women wants from a man, and you will be less likely to make the kind of mistake that made this article worth reading to you.

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